Saying goodbye to my 20s and Embracing my 30s
I turned 30 about two weeks ago. Leading up to that day I was honestly dreading it. I didn’t hit all the goals I had for my 20’s. Things like becoming a mom, paying off all my student loan debt (even though I accrued more during my late 20’s as I went back for my Master’s degree), and other things. However, something I have learned is that these goals don’t just go away. Just because I put a time limit on certain things in life, doesn’t mean my time has ended or is over. My 20’s were a wild, messy, exhilarating, and complicated time. As a senior in high school when I was staring down my future and college, I never truly looked beyond that. I didn’t think about what the process of buying a house would be like, I didn’t know how much good and true work marriage took, and I definitely didn’t think friendships would also come with some form of complication and confusion. My 20’s taught me a lot about a myriad of topics. Some of these teachings I want to share with you too, even though you may be well past your 20’s I think some of these are good to remember in general.
30 things I learned in my first 3 decades:
1. Be kind to everyone you meet. Kindness goes a long way.
2. Give grace and be patient to react, especially when you’re upset or angry with someone.
3. Give generously.
4. Set boundaries for your time, your capacity, and your feelings.
5. Don’t compromise your beliefs.
6. Be honest with your friends, family, and yourself.
7. Work hard and learn to rest well.
8. Therapy doesn’t mean you're weak.
9. Sometimes you have to be your own biggest cheerleader, but don’t be afraid to let those close to you in.
10. Crying honor’s the pain. (A revelation I had while I was in a therapy session one day).
11. Move your body as often as you can. Exercise is good for your physical, spiritual, and mental health.
12. Remember, hurt people hurt people. Try not to take it all too personally.
13. Sunlight is the best medicine.
14. Experiences are greater than items. Memories last forever.
15. Tell your people you love them and appreciate them as often as you can. Sometimes you have to make it weird.
16. Learn to fall in love with who you truly are. Life is more beautiful that way.
17. Pray often and seek Jesus every day. It’s the most important relationship to have.
18. Even extroverts need time to recoup and recharge.
19. Relationships of any kind take work. The hard and honest conversations are worth it.
20. Every story has two sides, don’t be so hard headed you can’t hear out the other side.
21. Live in gratefulness.
22. Try new things.
23. Do the things you love to do.
24. Treat yourself and celebrate your victories big and small.
25. Laugh often, everyday if you can.
26. Call the people you love who don’t live close.
27. Never forget how strong you are.
28.I t’s okay to have more than one feeling about a situation, there is space for it.
29. Take time to respond if you need it.
30. Be unapologetically you to your core.
This isn’t a comprehensive list and I truly could go on and on and on. I think that this is my way of getting back into something I love and have missed for so long. To be honest, I didn’t know how to show back up in this space. I knew it had to happen because my heart has been longing for it. Thank you for being patient with me and for always showing up.
If you have anything you would add to my list, please feel free to drop it in the comments section.
I can’t wait to see where this leads Radiate Joy next.
Xoxo,
Rachel Marie
